Client A.
Request: lack of meaning in life, nothing to live for. Emotionally and at length talks about how there are many undertakings and activities, but at some point of realization always comes the feeling that it is meaningless. Clinically confirmed bipolar disorder (alternating manic and depressive states).
I suggest to start working with the part of the personality that constantly devalues any beginnings.
A.: it is a gramophone with a record that repeats that everything is meaningless. It is below the solar plexus, lying so that it is completely visible to me, while the others from the outside can only see a black stripe.
I ask, whose is it? Who gave it to me? When?
A.: A. took it right after birth, on the 4th day of life, I remember there are many guests in the house on the occasion of discharge, her mother is standing next to her and her aunt is telling her how all life is meaningless, and I accept this information because my mother is silent as if she agrees.
Clarifying about the mom’s image: how does she react to her newborn daughter getting this information?
A: doesn’t want conflict, so she acquiesces.
Clarifies: The record plays two lyrics – one of my mom’s that I have to be a good person and try, and the other of my aunt’s that everything is pointless.
I note that there are 2 mutually exclusive injunctions spinning on the record: “do it to get approval – it’s all pointless.” After all, this is the essence of bipolar disorder (!)
Me: A., how do you see this situation from your adult position? Here’s a newborn baby girl, some woman is giving her information, her mother is inactive. What do you feel?
A: I see the aunt as miserable as ever, I feel the same way. And mom agrees because she’s afraid to argue.
Me: What do you feel?
A: I want to take her away from there.
From the adult part we say the words to her:
I’ve come for you. You’re safe now. I authorize you to return all limiting beliefs to whoever gave them, along with the gramophone. I authorize you to give back to them all the harm you received from those beliefs. (At this point, the client has large quantities of spruce needles spilling out of her body in the form of images.) I’m giving back every bit of damage. I return to this place all the energy that is due to the nature of things.
The gramophone with the record returns to my mother and aunt, and they sit and listen to it intently. A. distances himself from them.
I allow you to rejoice in your birth, to accept your worth. I myself rejoice in my birth, and for me it is the greatest value. I accept you as you are. I allow you to be a blank slate and write your own life on it, and I won’t let anyone interfere with that. I allow you to show your spontaneity, to create, to manifest the way you want, that’s very valuable to me. I’m letting you just live, just be, for nothing. Because you are.
A. feels a release in the body, a relaxation. Accepting the baby. Feels like expansion, then like a little fox curled up inside the body. He feels good there….
Fragment of the session, published with the client’s permission.